What is Respite?

Respite is defined as: “lifting a burden or pain”. When living with a challenging child, that means someone else takes the child and gives parents a break. This is essential for children over 5 that are wearing their parents down to the angry, screaming style of...

What’s your kryptonite? I was ruminating about it lately and have some ideas and dilemmas but I have DEFINITE PROOF that our children were born to be superheroes! Remember the details of Superman’s early life? He was born on the planet Krypton that was going to blow apart so his...

Why are our children looking for a super hero? Why is this such a HUGE issue for our kids? Do we have to wear spandex and a cape to qualify?

Children From Trauma Are Looking for Protection

Our challenging children are looking for a protector to keep them safe from whatever happened to them...

Patience is Priceless

“Patience is not the ability to wait, but the ability to keep a good attitude while  waiting” says Joyce Meyer. Children often struggle with that skill as much as they struggle with self control. They are often impatient and anxious to have what they want or...

 

Fill your lamp so you can shine your light for others.

Take care of yourself so you can care for others.

Put the oxygen mask on yourself before helping a child with theirs.

Burnout is Effectiveness Terminated

How many different ways do we hear it and yet… It sure is...

There was a Huge Wall

I first saw Anna across the circle from me. Her long blonde hair hung in a braid over her shoulder. She was wearing a beautiful handmade Mennonite style dress but what struck me the most were her eyes. They were cold, dark and vacant. The happy chatter around the circle at...

Balancing Needs and Wants

My father often used the phrase “ Thanks a million!” I was reminded of that recently when I was in Oklahoma City with one of my favorite philosophers, Mary Ellen. She is a wise woman. My very favorite philosopher is, of course, Yoda, but Mary Ellen is a close...

We have adopted again! I know you think we are crazy after having three birth children, three adopted and about 100 foster kids over the years but it just happened! Yes, my cowboy is 73 years old! I can’t help it! I fell in love!!

Now, let me tell you what has happened these first...

Lies can become a “Hobby” for a child with RAD.

A typical child will sometimes lie when confronted with misbehavior. A child with RAD, reactive attachment disorder, often enjoys lying so much it becomes “a hobby”. They will tell people they had spaghetti for dinner...

Timmy is 8 ½ years old in this first photo out on the football field. Notice his clenched jaw and the expression of pain and anger in his eyes.

The second photo, at age 9, he actually looks like he wants to bash someone in the head with the baseball bat! Unfortunately that is often how...

Okay, I admit it, I’m not perfect. Whew, it’s out!

After training over 50,000 parents, teachers, and mental health professionals over the past twenty-five years, I have said a lot of things. Some of the things I have said have been taken out of context and misused to allude to the...

Children need to feel safe.

Many of our children were hurt at night, often in their own bed! Some children laid in their rooms and listened to screaming and fighting as their family was torn apart by hate. Night time is hard for these children. When they have an alarm on their door they know no...